he who mustn't be named gets his comeuppance
by anonymousjane
Summary: From day one, a terrible evil has been tormenting Buffy and her friends. What, you haven't noticed?Finally, Buffy decides to stand up to it, even if everyone else thinks she’s insane. Not to be taken too seriously! HAPPY ENDING! BA, WO, XA


**He-who-must-not-be-named-or-it-will-spoil-the-plot gets his comeuppance's.**  
  
**Summary: From day one, a terrible evil has been tormenting Buffy and her friends. What you didn't notice??? Finally, Buffy decides to stand up to it, even if everyone else thinks she's insane. Not to be taken too seriously! BA, WO, XA  
  
Disclaimer: The frightfully evil Joss Whedon owns everything... for now.  
  
Pairings: eventually BA, WO, XA (Soz, I like Spike and everything, but he's funnier when he's not acting like a love- sick puppy) (I also like Tara, but I just really think Oz and Willow are really cute together, so soz all spuffy or w/t shippers)  
  
A/N: Umm, I'm not even sure myself when this is set, but does it really matter?  
**  
"You know what?" Buffy exclaimed to Willow loudly, "I'm sick of this!"  
Willow looked over at her best friend, confusion evident on her face. "Sick of what, Buffy?" she asked, wondering where this sudden outburst had come from.  
  
Buffy threw up her hands "everything!" she said, gesturing around them.  
Willow's frown deepened as she looked around Buffy's perfectly normal, perfectly nice living room, not understanding what was wrong with it.  
  
Buffy, noticing Willow's puzzled reaction, stated, "c'mon Will, you know what I'm talking about!" and looked pointedly at the innocent red head siting opposite her.  
  
'Huh?' Willow wondered, really not knowing what she was talking about. "Buffy, I-"she began, then suddenly the realisation hit her. She stopped and gasped, 'surely she couldn't mean that!' she thought to herself ... could she???  
  
Willows eyes grew wide as Buffy nodded, confirming what Willow had feared was true.  
  
Fortunately, just at that moment she was spared from having to think of something to say, as Xander and Anya entered the room.  
Xander flashed them both a goofy Xander-style-grin, before noticing Willows panicked expression.  
  
"Will?" He asked, "something wrong?" Then, never one to miss an opportunity to tell his favourite story, he continued; "Y'know, if I didn't know any better I'd say you must have broken some yellow-"  
  
"Xander your self flattery is both annoying and inappropriate!" Anya interrupted, straightforward as ever. Then, looking over at Willow, she stated, "Willow you look pale and sickly, please tell us what is wrong, or at least whether it's contagious!"  
  
Willow looked over at them and finally, she managed to explain to them what was going on in a hushed whisper, (so that only the 4 characters could hear her and anyone reading this gets really annoyed that they STILL don't know what's going on.)  
  
There was a shocked silence when Willow finished. Xanders mouth fell open in surprise, and Anya was for the very first time, speechless with shock.  
  
Buffy looked at them and raised an eyebrow. She understood their surprise, but she also thought they were overreacting. "Oh, what?" she asked "Don't tell me you've never thought about it!"  
  
They all looked at her like she was insane, then, ignoring her question, Xander began to pace. "Ookay, nobody panic," he muttered to himself, "it's fine, we can deal with this, uuummm, okay, what do people usually do in situations like this?"  
  
"Oh, I know!" Anya exclaimed, putting her hand in the air like they were in nursery school and waving it around in front of Xanders face.  
Xander blinked, and looked over at the ex-vengeance demon, waiting for her to continue.  
  
Anya, having gotten everyone's attention proceeded to explain; "Well, from watching numerous programs on television, I have discovered that the most common solution to this sort of problem is..." She paused for dramatic effect "...to commit the person to an insane asylum!" she finished, grinning proudly.  
  
For a moment no one said anything, not moving a muscle as what Anya had just said sunk in. Then, Willow slumped back onto the sofa, rolling her eyes, and Xander ran a hand through his dark hair, sighing. Anya looked confused at their lack of enthusiasm.  
  
"Good idea, An, then maybe, if we're lucky Those quacks can convince Buffy to try and kill us again!"  
  
"Hey!" Buffy cried, "I'm sitting right here!" She frowned at him until he mumbled an apology, then exclaimed, "That's what I'm talking about anyway!"  
  
She ignored the worried expressions on her friends faces, "I mean think about it, I've died twice, sent the person I love to hell, gone insane and tried to kill my friends, had a sister implanted into my memory who was actually a mystical ball of light, fought a hell god." She paused to catch her breathe before continuing, "not to mention all the weird vampires and demons I've fought and killed! It just keeps getting worse and worse!"  
  
She then decided to go for it, to state what she knew they didn't want to hear... "And you know what? You all know who's responsible for this, for everything that happens around here!... and I'm sick of it!"  
  
All three of them tensed and went white, Buffy merely looked at them. Xander couldn't believe his ears, "Buffy-"He said "You, you just can't do this!"  
She fixed him with a level stare, "Why not?" she asked innocently.  
"You just can't" Xander's voice was high and panicky, he and Willow were looking around the room, anxiously, as if they thought someone might hear them.  
  
Anya was sat on the arm of the sofa, and was looking at Buffy strangely. "Well, what are you going to do?" She asked her.  
  
Buffy smiled "I, am going do nothing!" she stated, she then picked up a magazine, sat back in the chair and started to read, ignoring everyone.  
  
Willow and Xander sighed in relief as the slayer continued to do, well, nothing really.  
They sat back in the sofa with Anya and each picked up a book to read aswell.  
  
Just then a vampire crashed through the window, growling menacingly and generally making a big fuss. Everyone looked mildly surprised and turned to Buffy, who just sat there, completely ignoring the disturbance. After a while, It decided that After all it was just a vampire, and Buffy would probably kill it if they fought, and so, got bored and ran off.  
  
This happened several more times, until finally, Willow realised what Buffy was doing. "Oh no!" she cried, "Buffy, no, you shouldn't make him mad!"  
Buffy shrugged and went back to reading her magazine in silence.  
  
All of a sudden there was a terrible rumbling in the skies above Sunnydale, They all tensed as everything went black, even Buffy looked up from the magazine she could no longer read without any light.  
  
They all looked at each other, terrified, for they knew what was happening. Buffy started to think that maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all as the house started to shake, and her shelves crashed to the floor. They all cowered on the floor together, waiting...  
  
Suddenly a figure appeared, shrouded in darkness, in the middle of Buffy's living room. There was no question of the identity of this person.  
  
Buffy felt a lifetime of rage surge through her, confidently she stood up and marched over to the despicably evil man in front of her now.  
  
He was slightly overweight and had a mass of curly orange hair on his head. He scowled at Buffy, utter contempt showing on his face.  
"You dare!" he said, looking directly at her  
  
"Yeah" she said coolly, "I'm not afraid of you!" And with that, she punched him in the face. He cried out and fell over backwards.  
  
Willow and Xander looked on in disbelief, this isn't what they had expected, The man they had feared for so long was now cowering in the corner, whimpering. Xander got up, as did Willow and walked over to where Buffy was standing.  
  
"May I cut in?" He asked Buffy politely and when Buffy nodded, smiling, he bent down over the pitiful man, and punched him as hard as he could in the face. Finally, he could take his revenge, as did Anya. Willow followed suit with a powerful majik bolt, aimed straight for the mans chest.  
The man cried out in pain again, and looked up at them, pleading them to stop, "I'll do anything," he whimpered, "Anything!"  
  
The four friends smiled at each other, then proceeded to make their demands.  
  
Several days later  
  
Willow grinned as she saw Oz come towards her, guitar case in hand. He smiled and stopped in front of her, The light of the full moon shining down on them both.  
  
"You did it!" He said. This was in fact the understatement of the year, as Willow had in fact managed to sort out absolutely everything. She had discovered that she could use majik to cure Oz of his werewolfiness, and they were now very happy together. While Oz was away, he had been concentrating on 'the Dingoes' and they had become incredibly popular. Now there was no reason that they shouldn't be together. Everything was perfect, and so they lived happily ever after.  
  
A very nervous Buffy arrived at Angel Investigations, anxiously walking through the front door and looking around her. Cordelia entered the room seconds later, beaming with happiness. Buffy also smiled, knowing exactly why Cordy was so happy.  
"Buffy!" She exclaimed, "Hi!"  
  
"Hi cor-"Buffy started, only to be cut off by Cordelia  
  
"Let's not waste time on pleasantries, shall we, I've just heard from my agent that I have finally gotten the big break that we all know that I deserve, and I don't want to be late!" she said, smiling widely. She breezed past Buffy before stopping and turning back to her.  
  
"Just think, when I'm rich and famous, you'll be able to tell people that you used to know me!" and with that she gave Buffy her most 'aren't you happy that I take the time to talk to the little people' smile, and strided out the door.  
  
Buffy merely turned back around, rolling her eyes and sighing. Just then, Wesley and Gunn came through the door, also smiling.  
  
"Ah! Buffy!" Wesley greeted, "Good morning! I expect you're here to see Angel?" Buffy nodded, and said hi to Gunn, before asking them the question to which she already knew the answer to.  
  
"So, what are you guys so happy about?"  
  
Wesley grinned. "I'm glad you asked actually, Gunn and I have just come into some rather unexpected money, you see!"  
  
"Yeah," Gunn agreed, "and we're thinkin' of usin' it to start our own detective agency, 'Gunn's investigations'!"  
  
Wesley, who had been nodding emphatically up until that point, turned to his new partner, frowning. "I thought that we had agreed on "'Wyndom Price Investigations'?" Gunn laughed, shaking his head and walking off. Wesley looked after him for a moment, wondering what was so funny, before turning back to Buffy.  
  
"Yes, well... we still haven't agreed upon a name yet..."  
  
Buffy smiled, "Well, congrats Wes." She said, "I'm sure you'll like this job a lot more than the watcher gig!"  
  
"Yes, yes, I imagine I might." Wesley agreed, "Anyway, Angel should be out soon." He gave Buffy one last smile, before turning and following the path that Gunn had taken moments before.  
  
Not soon after this, Angel came out of his office, smiling. Buffy gasped at the sight of him in broad daylight, her breath catching in her throat. He calmly strode over to her, pulling her into a hug. She knew, in that moment she knew that her wish had been granted. Angel had all the advantages of being a vampire, yet none of the disadvantages. He could walk in light, yet still had vampire strength, and his soul was permanent now. She smiled happily, snuggling into his embrace, knowing now that everything would be perfect.  
  
After a while, Buffy pulled back, long enough to grin up at him, "So does this mean you'll be my date to Anya and Xander's wedding?" She asked. Angel merely smiled down at her, utterly content, before leaning down to kiss her. Buffy returned the kiss, already knowing the answer.  
  
AND SO THEY LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER!!!  
  
**Okay, so that was my story, I wonder whether anyone managed to guess who the mystery EVIL guy was? Please review, since you've no doubt already read this. I wanna know whether anyone figured it out... thanx 4 reading, cyaz**  
  
Luv Angie  
x 


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